They're back and I am not happy. They = holiday inflatables.
Seriously, I thought we had this talk last year. (see here if you have no idea what I am talking about or want a refresher.) Why can't people just stop with the obnoxious front yard ornaments and invest in a nice IRA? I am really going to write a handbook that people must sign before hanging decorations. It will also come with a list of suggestions of other ways to make yourself festive for the holidays. Baking is always a good way to show cheer. How about randomly picking names from the phonebook and sending them money? Nothing says, 'I love the holidays,' more than randomly giving out money.
We put all the Christmas decorations up at work today. This again, annoys me. I know Christmas is great and all, but please, let's not forget Thanksgiving. Had I more skill in website development and some more time, I would start a site called savethanksgiving.org. Why .org? I think the org ending makes things seem a little more official.
Holy shit, I just googled save thanksgiving and there already is a site called savethanksgiving.org. Those bastards took my org. They also want to move Thanksgiving to October. Reasons why they want to move t-day to October are as follows:
The Pilgrims and Indians most likely celebrated Thanksgiving in October. October is closer to most autumn harvests.
Moving Thanksgiving to October opens new opportunities for family vacations. There will be fewer weather-related travel problems.
Because of catalog sales, TV shopping networks, and the Internet, the Christmas holiday buying season no longer waits until after Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is losing its visibility.
A Thanksgiving holiday in October creates a more balanced school calendar for students.
Clearly, I need to get a new website address. Maybe I will be a .com. And I also don't want to move the holiday, although a more balanced school year is just what I need. I just want to make some rules about when people can put up the Christmas stuff. I should not be walking into Walgreens and hearing Christmas music already. I always thought the day after T-Day was the official kick off. Why the need to rush things? Let's enjoy the time we have before Kenny G and his sax take over the radio waves with his youletide carol.
I think that if Thanksgiving had catchy songs that accompanied it, more people wouldn't skip right over it. We are a nation of singers. We love a good catchy tune. And bad ones too. I already have one song in the works. I call it 'Gobble.' I don't have lyrics yet, but I can already hear the Thanksgiving carols at my door now. 'Gobble, Gobble, Gobble,' they sing. And it sounds amazing.
Night kids.
Seriously, I thought we had this talk last year. (see here if you have no idea what I am talking about or want a refresher.) Why can't people just stop with the obnoxious front yard ornaments and invest in a nice IRA? I am really going to write a handbook that people must sign before hanging decorations. It will also come with a list of suggestions of other ways to make yourself festive for the holidays. Baking is always a good way to show cheer. How about randomly picking names from the phonebook and sending them money? Nothing says, 'I love the holidays,' more than randomly giving out money.
We put all the Christmas decorations up at work today. This again, annoys me. I know Christmas is great and all, but please, let's not forget Thanksgiving. Had I more skill in website development and some more time, I would start a site called savethanksgiving.org. Why .org? I think the org ending makes things seem a little more official.
Holy shit, I just googled save thanksgiving and there already is a site called savethanksgiving.org. Those bastards took my org. They also want to move Thanksgiving to October. Reasons why they want to move t-day to October are as follows:
The Pilgrims and Indians most likely celebrated Thanksgiving in October. October is closer to most autumn harvests.
Moving Thanksgiving to October opens new opportunities for family vacations. There will be fewer weather-related travel problems.
Because of catalog sales, TV shopping networks, and the Internet, the Christmas holiday buying season no longer waits until after Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is losing its visibility.
A Thanksgiving holiday in October creates a more balanced school calendar for students.
Clearly, I need to get a new website address. Maybe I will be a .com. And I also don't want to move the holiday, although a more balanced school year is just what I need. I just want to make some rules about when people can put up the Christmas stuff. I should not be walking into Walgreens and hearing Christmas music already. I always thought the day after T-Day was the official kick off. Why the need to rush things? Let's enjoy the time we have before Kenny G and his sax take over the radio waves with his youletide carol.
I think that if Thanksgiving had catchy songs that accompanied it, more people wouldn't skip right over it. We are a nation of singers. We love a good catchy tune. And bad ones too. I already have one song in the works. I call it 'Gobble.' I don't have lyrics yet, but I can already hear the Thanksgiving carols at my door now. 'Gobble, Gobble, Gobble,' they sing. And it sounds amazing.
Night kids.
1 comment:
DUDE, THAT IS SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!! OHHHHH SOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY JESS!
LIZ ; )
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